Dan Reads Twilight – Part 1: The Beginning

by The Comedy Nerds on June 22, 2010

I was looking for a project for this summer and I’ve decided that I am going to read the book “Twilight” and report back to you folks here about my experience. Why am I doing this? One, I am so far away from the target audience, and I want to see what it is like to read a book that is not, and never was, intended for me. When I watched Monty Python for the first time, despite the humor being largely universal, there are still references to 1960’s British life that I had no understanding of. I maintain that I actually had a better experience,  than the people who originally watched it. The show was already so weird that these seemingly random allusions to what I assumed to be invented people, places and culture movements made it seem like it had been beamed from some distance planet. (I mean really, Stratton-upon-Avon? There was no way that was the name of a real place.) So will I find things in “Twilight” that were not intended? There’s only one way to find out.

Secondly, I am a huge fan of passing fads. Ephemeral media whose popularity burned blindingly bright, only to be wadded up and tossed into a garbage can across the room. No matter how we want to remember it now,  Kris Kross and Crash Test Dummies were just as popular as Nirvana and Pearl Jam. And there ain’t a goddamn thing anyone can do about that. So I want to jump into a passing fad as it zooms by. Am I wrong about “Twilight”? Will it be a Pet Rock or the new “Wizard of Oz”? Only time will tell, but as I dive in, I’ll talk about what I think it’s chances are of holding on.

Which leads me to what I do know about Twilight. It’s not much, I haven’t actively avoided it, but I haven’t actively avoided the latest Algerian elections and I don’t know much about those either. Both just don’t come up too much in the circles I run in. Here is what I do know:

• The books involve vampires.

• These vampires glow in the dark.

• The main character’s name is Bella.

• Bella falls in love with a vampire, but they break up, presumably due to the pressure of he being a vampire and her not.

• Bella also falls in love with a werewolf.

• At no point does she fall in love with a mummy, the Creature from the Black Lagoon, or the Leprechaun from the movie “Leprechaun”. At least not that I know of.

So what will I learn on my journey? Will I fall under the spell of the story of a love that dare not speak it’s name or go near garlic? We’ll see. Check back here for the first installment next week. See you then!

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